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Child of the netizen on my babyish bosom is hired abandon in the room penniless
From;  Author:Stand originally

Mei Ying sits in me before, undemonstrative and gentle and quiet, also did not look, she can have conceived the child.
Shadow of my signal plum drinks tea, go up in insular cafes, be like those who suit Mei Ying to also have tea only, she does not like to drink coffee, what can let him remember him is sad male friend, do not be willing to drink glacial water more, wanting to feel panicky. I know, because have psychological responsibility,Mei Ying is, have half-baked cherished desire all the time, also include her to not hesitate sacrifice oneself job and one's deceased father grind plan, and the aching child that destroyed 5 many months, this to the woman, it is aching all one's life.
On the net, know the one's lot of shadow of a few plums, and she is willing to sit before me to pour out more, she says, have safe feeling to her so, when conceiving male friendly child that 4 years greatly after all, she also is the fortuitous meeting that attends because of the network, in life most one page of gray, the happiness of original dream and good future, because of after be pregnant, suffer of male friend abandon to be changed for zero.
Mei Ying is licked lick a lip, begin to talk, I watch the convention that licked a lip to had become her, have the woman of this kind of habit, fear to do not have safe feeling, approach oneself life especially, the coma that comparatives, approach prospective life, very pessimistic also.
Actually that was 2005 the thing first, at that time, I am being read big 3, an university of Beijing, love went up far a schoolboy in Xi'an, I say, I had not talked about love, you are the first. He tells me, he is maiden also. We begin to chat, have good opinion to each other. Later, I like to read his article, and tell him, his character very drawing me, he tells me straight-outly, be willing to do his girlfriend, such all the time association goes down. At that time, to me, this is a coincidence, pass without love after all, talked about period of time, the feeling to him always is cannot say come, knowing is to like him, still care about him, be willing to throw feeling on his body anyway, and I tell me this kind of feeling most the classmate that be close friends, she is foolish foolish laugh, telling me next should be love.
Proper my love when, I do not know really, my position in his memory how, after all we are love in the net, I perhaps am him only one of numerous prey, perhaps say a bit more Orphean, he just regards me as the possibility of a kind of life or a paragraph of experience or a game, just ask I am willing to do his girlfriend, won't ask next of what problem. I also do not know how to should handle manage and his relation.
such, the relation is in all the time. After a year, he says, we meet. Then, I chose to go Xi'an, he is very good all the time to me, and what meeting time and opportunity hold is particularly appropriate, I discover, one's previous experience of his commercial old and well-known family the style of writing as him is same, self-confident and do not be proud, just and not arrogant, let a person aux would rather the lifetime that gives oneself for him. Winding the day of the lunar circle of Beijing, I delivered to this to see the male friend that talks on the network of second face only entirely, but, absolutely cannot think of, after returning Beijing, lunar end this " hapless " when not " hapless " , spent 5 yuan of money to buy a test paper, him discovery conceived his child. Because of self-respect, I did not tell him pregnant thing directly, chose to give him to leave a message in rich guest however, but he leaves a message to me say, oneself did not graduate, raise the child feebly at all, ask I am destroyed. I do not have farewell word.
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